Sunday, January 02, 2005
HAPPY FUCKING NEW YEAR!!!! HURRAH!!!!
Oh, and don't wear a party hat, wear a Trojan Condom and be safe.
...
Oh, and watch out for those killer tsunami's. They really catch you off guard sometimes when you aren't looking.
Oh, and don't wear a party hat, wear a Trojan Condom and be safe.
...
Oh, and watch out for those killer tsunami's. They really catch you off guard sometimes when you aren't looking.
Friday, December 17, 2004
You know what? I have this craving... this craving for pancakes. Soft, fluffy pancakes that make your mouth water. Pancakes with chocolate poured all over them. Pancakes with whipped cream and a strawberry on top. Pancakes drenched in syrup, almost dripping off the plate.
Damn, I want some pancakes.
Damn, I want some pancakes.
Friday, December 03, 2004
I've never really noticed how perverted music is. Do people have this urge to express their perverted thoughts through song, thus being heard through millions of radios world wide?
And I thought the priests were bad.
But it isn't just one particular music style. It's ALL OF THEM. Sure, everyone knows rap and rock have perv lyrics, but so does country, blues, polka, and even the HOLY WORD OF GOD.
Yes, those songs you sing out loud when you go to church are also perverted. Song of Songs is a prime example. "and your breasts are like clusters of fruit. I said 'I will climb the palm tree and take hold of its fruit.' Let your breasts be like the clusters of the vine, the fragrence of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best of wine."
I don't know about you, but I think that's why alter boys are becoming more scarce these days.
And I thought the priests were bad.
But it isn't just one particular music style. It's ALL OF THEM. Sure, everyone knows rap and rock have perv lyrics, but so does country, blues, polka, and even the HOLY WORD OF GOD.
Yes, those songs you sing out loud when you go to church are also perverted. Song of Songs is a prime example. "and your breasts are like clusters of fruit. I said 'I will climb the palm tree and take hold of its fruit.' Let your breasts be like the clusters of the vine, the fragrence of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best of wine."
I don't know about you, but I think that's why alter boys are becoming more scarce these days.
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
My Stance on Ol' Dirty Bastard
Maybe it’s just a human thing to rush to deify the dead. For whatever reason, we seem to feel like we have the right to kick you mercilessly while you are alive but the second you die, then suddenly all is forgiven.
Look, when ODB or ol’ dirty bastard, Dirt McGirt, Big Baby Jesus or (his legal name) Russell Jones died, as a human being, that was a loss. It’s a loss because he won’t have the opportunity to grow from the mistakes that he made with his life and hopefully become a better person, but don’t start in with me about what kind of person of great character he was. The man had reportedly over a dozens kids. I have no problem with that.
Fuck all you want.
However most of those childern he didn’t take care of.
I have a little problem with that.
Unless something changed after he got out of jail on those gun charges I still have a problem with that five years later.
This man went on MTV, and with several of his kids, took a limousine to a welfare office and picked up food stamps.
This man had hundreds of thousands of dollars if not millions to his name.Somehow I doubt a bank account like that qualifies you for government assistance.That wasn’t justified when he was alive why would it be once you die?
I didn't know ODB personally. You’re not obligated because you are black to support trifling shit that black people do just to show a united front.
If something offends your sensibilities you are obligated to stand by your convictions and say something about it.
If you have children that you don’t take care of, you aren’t going to endear yourself to me because you make a funny song about “Shimmy Shimmy Shaking”.
People you need to learn how to separate yourselves from what a person can do and who a person is.
Being able to sing and dance does not make you a good human being. Being able to score a touchdown or dunk a basketball or score a hockey goal doesn’t make you an upstanding citizen.
The only criterion for judging whether or not someone is a good human being is how to relate with other human beings. And there is no relationship more crucial than the one you have between yourself and your own children.
Not taking care of the little ones that count on you to provide for safe, nurturing, healthy environment for them when you bring them into this world is something that cannot be understated as a “problem”.
Taking advantage of the welfare system, which should be for people that actually need it, going on television in a limo and picking up your food stamps not only plays into the welfare queen stereotype but it just add further fuel to the fires that say that it isn’t working and needs to be abandoned.
Now, I give ODB a little leeway, because he was a crack head after all.
Drug addicts by nature do things that are not within their normal realm of behavior.
Maybe he was so high, so often, that we never saw his normal behavoir.
But to actually call this crack head a hero, or an icon, dead or not, man, you need to find better heroes.
I know a lot of heroes have built in weaknesses, but one of them shouldn’t be his character.
Monday, November 08, 2004
I am so sick and tired of the acronym "lol" that I have decided to change the meaning of it into something more... suitable.
LOL = Lick our Logs
BFF = (originally Best Friends Forever) Butt-Fucking Faggets
LMAO = (originally Laugh my ass off) Lick my ass off
...And that's all I really came up with. Credit to some random dude sitting next to me for the BFF one.
LOL = Lick our Logs
BFF = (originally Best Friends Forever) Butt-Fucking Faggets
LMAO = (originally Laugh my ass off) Lick my ass off
...And that's all I really came up with. Credit to some random dude sitting next to me for the BFF one.
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Some people in this world are so stupid, they think they are smart. You know the people I'm talking about. People that act like they're the shit and know everything until you have to swat them down before their head gets too big.
There is one person in particular which I hate who happens to act like this. I won't mention his name, but he's short and the picture perfect resemblence of Eminem if he were retarded. He is a pothead, obviously, which explains a lot. I know weed isn't neccesarily a bad drug, but it makes people act so fucking stupid it's unbelievable.
The other day in the bus on the way home, my friend was doing stupid stuff, we were all laughing, etc., when he made the comment of "Potheads wish they had my natural high", or something of that nature. In turn, the above mentioned idiot started acting tuff, trying to prove himself for one reason or another. But he also made a stupid comment, and that's where he fucked up. He said "I think that people who don't smoke pot just don't know what's going on in the real world, and their lives are so boring and empty."
I didn't have a problem with the first thing he said, because everyone in this world has their own views of reality. What ticked me off was the little bit he added at the end. My life is empty because I don't smoke pot? Please, I've heard less stupid comments from my dog. Here is a rundown of my remarks versus his.
1. His life is more full because he smokes himself stupid everyday so he can go throw rocks at the neighborhood dogs with his friends everyday.
2. He gets laid more than I do.
Now these were my remarks.
1. My life is empty because of the fact that I don't smoke and I don't get laid, but let's just exclude the fact that I have been to California 3 times, Florida twice, Scotland 3 times, been to Australia for 3 whole weeks in which I saw the Great Barrier Reef, spent the night at a 250,000 acre cattle farm learning how to use a bullwhip,I saw the Sydney Opera House which is the biggest Opera house in the world, I saw the Olympic Stadium in Sydney I stayed with a foster home for a week, I went swimming, surfing, body boarding, water skiing, scuba diving, and various other native past times, I have had a total of 3 foreign exchange students live with me for 9 months at a time (except for the last one, because she was stupid too), and my parents actually give a shit about my life.
Wham, bam, bodyslam bitch. As far as I'm concerned, pot does absolutely nothing for your life. NOTHING. If someone can actually tell me what pot does for them in the long run, post it and I'll give kudos for trying.
There is one person in particular which I hate who happens to act like this. I won't mention his name, but he's short and the picture perfect resemblence of Eminem if he were retarded. He is a pothead, obviously, which explains a lot. I know weed isn't neccesarily a bad drug, but it makes people act so fucking stupid it's unbelievable.
The other day in the bus on the way home, my friend was doing stupid stuff, we were all laughing, etc., when he made the comment of "Potheads wish they had my natural high", or something of that nature. In turn, the above mentioned idiot started acting tuff, trying to prove himself for one reason or another. But he also made a stupid comment, and that's where he fucked up. He said "I think that people who don't smoke pot just don't know what's going on in the real world, and their lives are so boring and empty."
I didn't have a problem with the first thing he said, because everyone in this world has their own views of reality. What ticked me off was the little bit he added at the end. My life is empty because I don't smoke pot? Please, I've heard less stupid comments from my dog. Here is a rundown of my remarks versus his.
1. His life is more full because he smokes himself stupid everyday so he can go throw rocks at the neighborhood dogs with his friends everyday.
2. He gets laid more than I do.
Now these were my remarks.
1. My life is empty because of the fact that I don't smoke and I don't get laid, but let's just exclude the fact that I have been to California 3 times, Florida twice, Scotland 3 times, been to Australia for 3 whole weeks in which I saw the Great Barrier Reef, spent the night at a 250,000 acre cattle farm learning how to use a bullwhip,I saw the Sydney Opera House which is the biggest Opera house in the world, I saw the Olympic Stadium in Sydney I stayed with a foster home for a week, I went swimming, surfing, body boarding, water skiing, scuba diving, and various other native past times, I have had a total of 3 foreign exchange students live with me for 9 months at a time (except for the last one, because she was stupid too), and my parents actually give a shit about my life.
Wham, bam, bodyslam bitch. As far as I'm concerned, pot does absolutely nothing for your life. NOTHING. If someone can actually tell me what pot does for them in the long run, post it and I'll give kudos for trying.
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
Well, this sucked. Everyone knows by now that I am the one who houses the foreign exchange students in our school. The first year I brought Alfredo over. He was from Spain. A bit of an ass, but he was an ok guy in the end.
Florian was next. He was from Germany. He was an ok guy too. Guys just seem to be like that, I think it's in the gene's or something.
Now this year, a girl from the Czech Republic came over. Wow, a girl! Yeah, hard to believe that I got a beautiful *I'm not exaggerating either* foreign girl living in my house! For a whole 9 months! But alas, I knew it was too good to be true.
Almost as soon as she got here, I could tell just by seeing her face that she was sad. About what? How would I know? Anyways, it's been a couple of weeks now. I guess I must be uglier than I thought, because she is leaving on the 5th of September.
Turns out that she misses her boyfriend back home. A 27 year old MAN. I've heard of girls who like older guys, but damn, that's a 10 year difference! Anyways, I think it's bullshit anyway. You get one chance to come to America, a chance of a lifetime, a chance to spend 9 full months here, and what happens? You get sad and go home because you miss your boyfriend.
There are just too many things in this world that piss me off.
Florian was next. He was from Germany. He was an ok guy too. Guys just seem to be like that, I think it's in the gene's or something.
Now this year, a girl from the Czech Republic came over. Wow, a girl! Yeah, hard to believe that I got a beautiful *I'm not exaggerating either* foreign girl living in my house! For a whole 9 months! But alas, I knew it was too good to be true.
Almost as soon as she got here, I could tell just by seeing her face that she was sad. About what? How would I know? Anyways, it's been a couple of weeks now. I guess I must be uglier than I thought, because she is leaving on the 5th of September.
Turns out that she misses her boyfriend back home. A 27 year old MAN. I've heard of girls who like older guys, but damn, that's a 10 year difference! Anyways, I think it's bullshit anyway. You get one chance to come to America, a chance of a lifetime, a chance to spend 9 full months here, and what happens? You get sad and go home because you miss your boyfriend.
There are just too many things in this world that piss me off.
